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July 07, 2008

Army Wives: The good, the bad and the ugly

"Army Wives" - the Lifetime show about military life - hit its stride this week in a big way.

From the homecoming scene at the beginning through Frank and Denise's long-distance marital troubles right up to the memorial service at the end, last night's episode had scene after scene that those of us who are real-life "Army Wives" experience on a daily basis.

Our friend mauimere said it best during the live chat: "This one was definitely a five-tissue episode."

Here's our take:

THE GOOD
- The MIA comes home. The episode paid tribute to a soldier missing in action from Vietnam and, perhaps more significantly, the Joint POW-MIA Accounting Command. JPAC, based in Hawaii, is a military unit that exists solely to find and bring home the remains of soldiers missing from past conflicts.

- Frank and Denise continue to clash. We've seen Denise finish her nurse's training and go back to work, make new friends and start riding a motorcycle. Last season, Frank's unwillingness to embrace the changes in Denise seemed archaic. This week, we saw where he was coming from when he told Denise in a phone call from Iraq: "It feels like you're changing and, here, I'm just treading water and I can't keep up."

- Roxy and Trevor's reunion. He cried when he talked to her about the man he killed, and, although the homecoming was happy, it felt like everyone was holding their breath waiting for the other shoe to drop. Just like in real life.

THE BAD
- The show's continued references to "The FRG." First of all, few people outside the military know what FRG means (Family Readiness Group). Second, Claudia Joy sounds like she's piloting an aircraft carrier when she says things like "I'll mobilize the FRG." Folks in the FRG have their own families and lives, too. They're not just sitting around waiting for the order to pounce into someone else's life.

THE UGLY
- Joan's replacement. A cocky officer new to the base announces he's Joan's "backfill" when she goes on maternity leave. He right away points out that he doesn't have combat experience. That's a pretty touchy subject, and not one you'd bring up during a first meeting (or maybe ever).

How about you? What'd you think about this week's episode?

July 06, 2008

You're Invited

What: "Army Wives" viewing party and live chat.

When: 9:45 p.m. to 11:30 p.m. tonight.

Where: Right here in the comments section to this post.

Why: Because it's more fun to watch with friends.

No RSVP necessary. BYOB. Friends/dates/spouses welcome!

July 05, 2008

Is this it?

Something strange happened yesterday at our local Fourth of July parade.

Several times as we watched the marching bands and Cub Scouts and church groups go by, my kids saw people they knew

First was a mom from Rian's preschool. Then a friend of Jace's from school. Then a neighbor's cousin. Then another friend from school.

We've never lived anyplace where there was a Fourth of July parade, let alone one where we knew people in it.

And that's when it happened: We started to think, maybe this is home. Maybe this is where we should be.

Maybe, after 17 years of nomadic military life, we're ready to settle down.

Why is that such a scary thought?

July 04, 2008

TGIF and Live Chat Sunday

My partner Bill Levesque and I are still settling in over at The OP. Stop by and take our survey on media coverage of the war, and watch for Bill's story about his thrilling ride aboard a KC-135 (or, as my kids call it, "the flying gas station").

In the meantime, our weekly "Army Wives" live chat and viewing party is moving back over here to Standing By. We'll be right here in the comments section at 9:45 p.m Sunday.

This week's preview on Lifetimetv.com shows Denise continuing to break out of her shell, while Frank secretly tries to sell her motorcycle. The plot thickens ...

It's Friday and a holiday. We kicked it off last night with mojitos for me and German beer for Mark, and 30 minutes of dancing around the living room with the kids.

TGIF!

July 03, 2008

Happy Fourth of July

I posted this a year ago today:

My son, Jace, who is five, told one of his friends the other day:

"My dad's in Iraq and he's gonna get shot and he's never coming home."

I have no idea how to respond to that one.

I want to promise Jace that Daddy's OK and he will be safe and he will come back to us all in one piece. But I can't. Because what if he's not and what if he doesn't?

This Fourth of July, Mark will go to the parade with us and to the neighbor's cook-out. He'll sit with us while we watch fireworks and the kids do sparklers and the adults drink red, white and blue margaritas.

This weekend I'm not going to worry about yesterday or tomorrow or next year.

I'm just going to enjoy my family and our time together.

We've come a long way, baby.

July 02, 2008

Our "Army Wife" survey says ...

Remember the survey we posted the other day about "Army Wives?"

Here's the results:

More than a third of you (35 percent) consider yourselves most like Roxy. Second place, with 26 percent, was a tie between Denise and Pamela. Poor Claudia Joy came in last with just 13 percent of the vote.

One surprise about the poll: Votes came in from 16 states, ranging from Florida to Alaska. I had no idea we had readers all across the country.

Let's find out just how far we reach. What city, state or country are you in right now?

July 01, 2008

Army wife, Olympian ... this lady does it all

Check out our post today over at The OP about Adriane Stone, an Army wife who overcame alcoholism and adversity - while married to a deployed soldier and raising three kids - to compete in this week's Olympic track and field trials.

I've never been a big fan of the high jump, but I'll sure be watching now ...

Maybe then, everything will be normal

It's 11:45 on a Monday night and where am I?

On my back porch with a beer and a pack of cigarettes.

I'm in my favorite spot, the one where I spent so many long nights when Mark was deployed.

This has become my retreat, the place where I find comfort and the place where I connect to all of you and the place where I feel like maybe, somehow, everything will be OK.

Mark's been home five months now. For the most part, it's going fine. But we have those moments where we just don't connect. Those times when it feels like we've both changed so much and neither one of us realizes it or wants to accept it.

They say it takes a year to re-adjust after your spouse comes home from the war. We're almost halfway there.

And just like when Mark was gone, I'll be so glad when this year is over.

June 30, 2008

Our very scientific "Army Wives" poll

The over-riding theme of last night's episode of "Army Wives" was this: Life goes on, whether you like it or not, so embrace it while you can.

I can't think of a better sentiment for those of us dealing with deployments, re-integration, moving or other military-life challenges.

This week's good, bad and ugly review is over at The OP. Go on over and let us know what you thought about the show.

Meanwhile, we're trying something new here today - our first-ever totally scientific (wink, wink) poll. Take a minute to answer the question, and then, if you want, tell us how you answered and why.

June 29, 2008

"Army Wives" Live Chat and Viewing Party

The live chat's in it's new digs over at The OP tonight.

Click here to join the fun!

About This Blog

Welcome to a behind-the-scenes look at what a family goes through when Daddy is sent to Iraq. The author, Jan Wesner, married her husband, Mark, 16 years ago. That was just a month after he went into the Army. They have moved eight times since then, including time in Hawaii, Okinawa, Korea and Germany. They moved back to Florida, where they both grew up, in September 2006. They have two young children, Jace and Rian. Jan has worked for more newspapers then she can remember and probably holds the record for most job interviews in a single lifetime. She currently works in the Times Brandon bureau. Mark recently returned from his one-year tour in Iraq.

E-mail Jan Wesner:
standingby@tampabay.com

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